Thursday, December 2, 2010

FROG SOUP









Dealing with a narcissist is like living in a wasteland.
A barren, lifeless, emotional wasteland.
Except the wasteland is what is left of you.



I had a note on my blog about my posts on narcissists. It's amazing to me how many of them are out there. It's definitely not a generational thing because there are very young women and older women who have been affected by these malignant life forms. 

I can't necessarily call them people because they are devoid of the emotions that we possess. The very characteristic of selfishness that we spend our lives struggling against and feeling guilty over is something they don't struggle with at all. They gave up and gave in to their selfishness. They no longer struggle against their baser qualities. They have a need for control over others but no control over themselves. They gave up, opened their arms and embraced their inner selfish, little child. They are actually proud that they can maneuver people and flout the rules to get their own way. They live in a fantasy world that they've created because reality simply does not apply to them. In other words, they're an empty shell.  For some reason, we gravitate toward them. I've spent a lot of years trying to figure out why it was so easy to infiltrate and remove my beliefs and replace them with something quite foreign. Why? Because they can. They are highly skilled in the art of manipulation and, in my case, gave me fair warning that he used it in every facet of his life. 


Why on earth did I find that so intriguing and attractive?


Frog Soup.


I love disaster movies and Dante's Peak is one of my favorites. There is a segment in the hospital and Pierce Brosnan is trying to get his team on board that something disastrous is looming. He then tells the story of Frog Soup.  If you put a frog in boiling water it will jump out. If you put a frog in cold water and slowly turn up the heat it will stay in the water until it boils to death.


This is what happens to us. If we got the full force of their nature we'd run for the hills. What happens is we are lured in, bit by bit. By the time we see the man underneath the mask we are too involved to let go. We start doubting our own sanity and reason.


Yep.


Frog Soup.


Run.










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